Saying “Yes” Is a Simple Way to Conquer Your Goals
We all have goals we aspire to conquer: relationship goals; fitness goals; spiritual growth goals; financial goals.
I have a reminder in my phone that pops up daily to tell me a target weight and fitness goal I set. I usually dismiss it with a “thanks for the reminder” sort of attitude. I’ll get to it later.
Why is it so hard to achieve our goals? Some of us have tried for years to no avail. For others, their goals are nothing more than a wish dream.
I can’t tell you how many times I have adults tell me they “wish” they could play a musical instrument. When I ask them why they don’t take lessons they usually respond with a laugh or a shrug.
What if conquering your goals was as simple as saying yes?
Anything worth having in life requires hard work
Your goals are achievable. The moment you tell yourself that your goal is out of reach, you have lost the battle.
Anything worth having requires hard work and discipline. If being physically fit were easy, everyone would be in amazing shape.
In my personal finance class that I teach to high school students, I show them a simple path for financial success that is realistic and achievable as long as they start early and keep discipline. When asked why more adults are not financially successful, the answer is easy: most of us lack the discipline necessary to make the kind of hard choices necessary to delay gratification today for a financial gain tomorrow.
It is easy and even natural to “yes” to the wrong things. We purchase items on debt that we don’t really need. I choose to eat more cookies and gummy bears than is advisable. A nap feels better than a trip to the gym.
Being lazy and mindless is easy. You will never conquer your goals by saying yes to the wrong things.
You have goals because the end result is desirable. If you want to be fit, spiritually disciplined, master an instrument, or get out of crippling debt, it is going to take hard work and discipline.
Anything worth having in life requires hard work and discipline.
Saying “no” is not enough
Refusing to eat a cookie is good but it is not enough. At some point, I will need to replace that cookie with a better alternative.
Years ago I read a sermon by Thomas Chalmers called “The Expulsive Power of a New Affection” that drove home this point. Chalmers pointedly put it,
…the only way to dispossess it (the heart) of an old affection, is by the expulsive power of a new one.
Saying no to laziness, sloth, lust, greed, or any other habit that has a grip on our hearts is not enough. We will need to replace that habit with a new one that will literally expel the old way.
In time, I must learn to love the sweaty joy of finishing a 50-minute cycling workout more than I relish taking a nap. I must train my tastebuds to enjoy my wife’s strawberry spinach salad more than I prefer cookie dough.
To conquer my goals I have to nurture new affections that will drive out my old, useless ones.
Consider the habits you are “feeding” in your life. This anonymous poem sums it well:
Two natures lie within my breast
One is cursed, one is blessed
One I love, one I hate.
The one I feed will dominate.
You must feed new habits in order for them to dispossess the old things you love.
My cycling coach Jeni taught me the importance of saying “yes”
Over the Christmas break, Gail and I bought one of those home cycling rigs with a big screen and access to the iFit library of workouts. It has actually been a very motivating means of working out, not just in the cold months, but even into the warmer season.
The studio classes have become our favorites. The coaches are great at reminding participants of why they hopped on in the first place. You will likely hear the phrase “set your intention” in one of these classes. It is a catchy way of reminding you why you got on the bike.
One of the instructors, Jeni DelPozo, has a catchphrase she often uses: “Just say yes.” You will hear Jeni boldly declare this as she pushes you to climb a hill: “Just say “yes” to 75rpm. You can do it.”
I have found this simple self-command to be very motivating when the workouts get hard. “Just say “yes” to one more hard push.” Self-talk can be incredibly effective.
Jeni got me thinking that this simple strategy would be quite effective across multiple goals.
What goal do you need to conquer by just saying “yes”?
Do you want to learn an instrument like the guitar at 40 years old? What is holding you back? Just say “yes” to weekly lessons, and as a guitar coach, I can guarantee you by saying “yes” to a daily 30-minute practice you will be surprised at what you can play in six months’ time. You just need to say “yes” and stop wishing your life away. You can and will learn to play guitar.
A couple of years ago, I looked at my sloppy handwriting and the pace of my life and decided that learning calligraphy would be a good idea to fix my handwriting and slow me down. I set an intention to start regularly doing calligraphy, bought some books and basic gear, and started learning. Lo and behold, with a little bit of regular practice, I am getting the hang of it.
Perhaps you want a better relationship with a spouse or your kids. Set an intention over the next year to make improving those relationships a priority. Say “yes” to being unselfish, to putting their needs first, and to being present in their lives. You might be surprised what those relationships look like in mid-2022.
I often hear from people who claim they wish they would read more books, their Bible, or devotional books. Just say “yes” to making a start. Don’t create unrealistic goals of reading 30-50 pages per day. Say “yes” to reading five pages per day. In one month you will have read 150 pages.
You can conquer your goals, but you have to start saying “yes”
I read a short piece recently from a fitness coach who advised rolling out of bed and doing a two-minute plank. The reason is that it releases happy, positive chemicals in the brain in addition to the physical benefit of strengthening your core.
I have found that this two-minute plank is a simple way to say “yes” to something challenging right away. Completing the plank is hard but also gives me a simple sense of achievement to start the day.
Your goals are desirable but also achievable. Do not underestimate your ability to grow and accomplish some really exciting things over the next couple of months and years.
We are living in a time when the number of instructional tools and videos has exploded. What excuse could you possibly have for not taking a serious shot at conquering your goals?
When you are faced with the choice to take the lazy, mindless way out of pursuing your goals or the more disciplined path to conquering your goals, remember: you just need to get disciplined at saying “yes” to the step in front of you today.
By saying “yes” over and over, that choice will become easier and more natural. Set an intention to be a life-long learner.
Saying “yes” is a really simple way to help you conquer your goals in 2021.
