Is There More To This Discontented Life?
Deflated and disappointed, Cindy was brave enough to confess, “Is this all there is for me in life?” The uninformed observer would have been surprised to hear her ask that question.
On the outside, Cindy had it all: attractive looks, beautiful home, successful husband, and cute kids. But on the inside, Cindy was experiencing an existential crisis that left her with a crushing sadness.
Cindy was a sincere follower of Jesus. How perplexing it is for a Christian to arrive at the place where we disappointedly say to Jesus, “Where is the abundant life you promised?”
This is one of those moments in pastoral work that shaped the way I “preached” to God’s people. Young ministers, who have not tasted the real hardships of life, have a tendency to get on soapboxes to point out the shortcomings of the congregation.
Cindy gave me a vision that has changed the way I write sermons. As I study, pray, and write, I think to myself: “How is this message bringing the light, life, and love of Jesus to the dark sadness someone like Cindy is feeling?”
I have learned to picture Jesus sitting face to face with Cindy, as she asks those piercing questions about her discontented life.
I picture Jesus with tender, attentive eyes, listening closely to the lament of her heart. His disposition is never harsh or judgmental. He is not shaken by her questions.
He is also deeply perceptive, wise, and patient in how he lovingly leads Cindy out of her darkness into his gentle, saving light.
The One who calmed the stormy seas can speak hope to the despairing soul.
Jesus has a purpose and destiny for Cindy.
Matthew 12:20 says, “A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out.”
I know the gentleness of Jesus because I have been on the receiving end of His grace at a dark, confusing time in my life.
“A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out.”
Nothing makes a young executive feel like they have arrived quite like receiving calls from multiple headhunters looking for talent. Your name and reputation have achieved a status that gives you the sense that you are admired and desirable.
When my ego is stroked, it can be hard to discern if God is opening a door or if my heart is discontent and restless.
Looking at new career possibilities is like browsing for new cars or homes. I quickly become discontent with the car, home, or career I currently have. All of the defects, imperfections, and problems begin to loom large.
Especially when it comes to career, my heart soon hears the whispers of that same existential crisis Cindy confessed: “Is this all there is for me in this life?”
Discontentment shrinks my world. I start to grumble my frustrations about how small my town is, how limited is the reach of my influence, and how my best days are running out.
During one of these seasons of rapid fire calls from headhunters, I knocked on a couple of doors of opportunity that seemed to be open. One particular opportunity would have been a tremendous career step. I networked with the headhunting firm in charge of the search. The owner of the firm, an incredibly experienced Fortune 500 executive search consultant, eagerly reached out to me and set up a phone call.
I can recall telling Gail that I was sorely under-qualified for the opportunity, but open to the strange way God opens surprising doors.
When I got on that phone call, the owner of the firm confessed that he had looked at my resume and had mistaken me for someone else. Considering the profile of the search, he could have dismissed me and told me I did not have the experience. Instead, he stayed on the call and talked with me for a long time.
His first question was a punch that took the wind out of me. “Why did YOU express interest in this position?” The question came across as he intended: “Why on earth, would a nobody with an inexperienced resume like yours, possibly think you could land a job like this?”
I have not felt that small in a long time. The experience was more than humbling. My heart muttered, “You are a nobody.” I wondered if this is how a mid-life crisis starts.
I was smart enough to deflect and tell him that I expected the job would be filled by an experienced Fortune 500 executive and not by a peon like me. He said, “Good. You passed the sniff test.” By that, he meant that I was not some delusional idiot who was wasting his time.
He asked me about my experience and what I felt like God was calling me to do. At some point, it became very clear that I was not just talking to a high powered search consultant, but that Jesus had joined the conversation, like a heart surgeon with chest laid bare.
He said to me, “It is really clear to me that you have a lot of gifts and could probably be successful in a number of roles. But, just because you can do something does not mean you should.”
He then read to me from Ephesians 2:10: “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”
The last thing I wanted at that moment was a sermon. I could sense though that Jesus was carefully holding me like a bruised reed and would not break me.
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. -Ephesians 2:10”
The consultant went on to say, “God has good works that He designed specifically for you to do. You need to discover those and pursue them.”
My pride was bruised, but I was being gently pastored by someone who knew exactly what my heart needed to hear. His words did not break me, they saved me.
In my mind I said, “By the world’s standards, maybe I am a nobody, but I am content being Jesus’s nobody.” I was humbled and ready to be His instrument to be used however He needed.
I had allowed a season of discontentment to make small a world that was bursting with opportunities to do God’s good work.
Within two days of that call I closed every open conversation with other headhunters. My heart immediately became content with the good works God had right in front of me in my tiny, little town.
There are three things that people like me and Cindy need to do when we find ourselves asking, “Is there more to this discontented life?”
First, we need to get face to face with Jesus and voice our laments. He cares about your troubled heart. Cast your cares on Him, for He cares for you. He may gently remind you that you have fallen in love with lovers that are unable to satisfy your deepest longings. Jesus will tell you how He loved you all the way to the sad depths of a heavy cross to give you life.
Second, while we are face to face with Jesus, we need to pause and thank God for the good things in our lives we have taken for granted. Gratitude is a great weapon against despair.
Third, we need to ask gentle Jesus: “What good works have you prepared in advance for me to do in this season of life?” You and I were created and called to particular good works that God has designed for us to uniquely do! What purpose and hope we have!
As my years pass by, I am discovering a settled contentment in knowing that God might see fit to use me in ways that seem humanly small. A nobody is somebody with a noble purpose if they are Jesus’s nobody.
Yes, my friend, because of Jesus there is so much more to this discontented life.